Monday, August 31, 2015

embracing the natural.

So, excuse my absence... but I guess I am ready to update or rather just to write really.

Moving to a new city is the most exciting/exhausting thing. It opens up so many weird emotions. First of all, I know moving to Chicago was the perfect decision for me. I am beyond grateful that I was at a place in my life at 23 to move to the city of my dreams.

I feel like my life has changed dramatically every single month and that is partially because I am such a lunatic. I've had to really ask myself "what is important to me" on a daily basis and from the outside looking in my life seems pretty crazy but it is making more sense to me as time goes on.

So, heres the deal- I hate starting with this because I hate that our day-job defines us. I hate that the first thing people ask you is, "What do you do?" and that automatically defines how others view you. We are so much more than our professions. I know, jobs are important. We spend a lot of time working so it is interesting to ask people what they do. However, I think its important that we ask people, "What makes you happy?" first and foremost and then get the job questions later.

That is something I could rant about forever.

Anyway, I don't have a normal 9-5 job. I tried it for a few months, I gave it my best shot, I even bought a damn cardigan and cute patterned business pants that you see all over pininterest but something about routine and working in Humans Resources really kills every other aspirations in my life.

  Now, I don't even have the same job everyday of the week. Actually, I'm lying; I'm still trying to figure out what my job really is.

I'm interning at a theatre, I'm box-office tending at another theatre in exchange for classes, I'm teaching cycle classes and honestly any other group fitness classes I can weasel my way into; I'm working hard and dedicating my time to things that may or may not work out for me. I am a self-proclaimed risk taker.

Which is scary and over-whelming and insane and apparently not very attractive to a 9-5er who is looking for something a little more serious but not with you because you kind of have your head in the clouds and you're a bit too dreamy.

Well, I am.
I make rash decisions, that are almost always emotionally driven. Then I run from my emotions, bury them deep inside my soul and hide from all feelings that make me human. Its a constant battle. I blame the Pisces in me.

So, life is weird but I am a very hungry person.

And if that makes me a dreamer... well I'm not the only one.

Sierra Carter