Tuesday, May 10, 2016

everyday I go to space.

As of now my days are pretty calm. Busy but in a way I can handle it. I have a routine that I have adapted to and for the moment life just makes an okay amount of sense. -Of course I would love to be doing more. Auditioning more. Being in more shows. Making more connections. Writing more. Doing everything more. For once though, I'm not wasting my stress on things that don't matter. Less stress about the romanized version of my 9-5 job. The one I envisioned, the one I thought would really matter, the one I pressured myself to get because I thought it would make me feel worth something. I spent the majority of my first year searching for something that I knew would leave me unfulfilled but it sounds good? Writing it out like that seems silly but I was blinded by self expectations and the fear of letting myself rely on my actual dreams to make me happy.

The job I have now kind of found me in a way. I won't write too much about it but I spend time with two wonderful kids and spend most of my day pretending the kitchen table is a space ship that takes us to school but we never make it to school because we end up frozen in the realms of space!!!!!!
Its fun. I am happy with it.

On the other end of things (the side hustle, the dream, the not day-job) they are just going. I am about to finish up two comedy curriculums to which I will then enroll in another program and dedicate another year to learning comedy. Things are going.

Much like my day job I feel like I get frozen in the realms of comedy space. I'm moving forward, I'm spinning around, I'm going backwards.
Its fun.
I am happy with it.