Tuesday, July 8, 2014

when I am alone

Today's topic is things you do when you are alone... 

And if I'm being extremely honest, I live with a group of weirdos so anything I do alone I am more than likely doing it while they are home too. 

No pants
Singing loudly 
Practicing headstands 
Doing accents 
Angrily cleaning 
Ugly crying (about my life)
Happy crying (about how much I love my dog)
Binge watching T.V. Shows 
Shoving a bunch a food in my mouth 
Obnoxiously playing with my dog 

(After reflecting on this list a realize I am an absolutely PERFECT roommate) 

When I really, really think about times I've had alone, I think about my younger self and all the things I did that I would be super embarassed about if someone caught me in those moments.

The house I grew up in had a vanity area with a sink and a mirror above the sink, directly across from the sink was another full length mirror and when you stood in front of each of the mirrors- because they were directly across from each other.. It would appear as if you had multiple arms- if you used your imagination (like I often did) it could feel like there was multiple people behind you. 

See the back to back mirrors. 

So I would pretend I was the head dancer or cheerleader for some group and do all these different moves and I would break a sweat trying to hit the moves before my  multiple reflections hit the moves.. This was impossible- but the better half of my alone was spent dancing and sometimes yelling at my back up reflections.

Another thing my small self would be super embarassed about was the amount of time I spent trying to be Christina Aguilera "Genie in a bottle" version. I would watch that video again and again- I would try to match her dance moves, her clothes, the sexy look she gives the guy multiple times and everything else. 

Jean jacket, belly shirt & that weird up-do.... I was X-Tina. 

I lived for that alone time. 

It's weird because alone time when I was a kid was spent on me becoming something I wanted to be "head dancer" & "Christina Aguilera

Now it's spent on baths, meal prep, naps, reading, writing & just accepting being me. 

I think that's a wonderful place to be. 

Sierra Carter