Friday, August 29, 2014

the jitters.

It has become a tradition that I visit my father before every big journey- this of course is an accident because we aren't a traditional family. We have never been to Disney World (except maybe at a young age but I'm pretty sure my Dad was not there) his ideal vacation is to a city he has never been- vodka cran in hand while reading in the comfort of his hotel room. 

He leaves it up to me and my little brother to plan all the events- Tom has where we eat scheduled and I look into museum tours, must-sees and non touristy attractions (or so they say where the locals go) 

I have travelled. I am comfortable traveling and this is all thanks to my father. At the age of 14 he had me alone on a plane meeting him in Mexico.. to which my young self was absolutely fearless. Looking back now I could learn a lot from my fearless self. 

This week has been a small dose of what my life will be like for the next 6-weeks. (minus the whole language barrier thing) Although I am here to see my fazja he has to work and sleep because he works nights- my brother is at school- and I am left to entertain myself. 

My dad lives in Denton so I can walk pretty easily to a coffee shop, an ice cream shop, a book store, a bar, a theatre- all of which will be at walking distance (in most cities) when I go to Europe. I can run freely with out looking like a weirdo and there is a yoga studio near by if I wanted to partake. I am comfortable here. 

I have been here so many times- I am comfortable coming into my dads quiet, quaint home with 70s music playing in the background. I am comfortable with the lack of food he has and how every time I come over I tell him he cannot live off Brie Cheese, Vodka Cran and a side of Wild Turkey Shots* 

I am comfortable waking up to Dozer (the dog) barking at an inanimate object (which of course I assume is a bugler OR some sort of paranormal figure ) I am comfortable forcing conversation with my now too-cool-for-school 16 year old brother who has a cynical, jaded view of the world. 

Next week- I feel like I will be uncomfortable waking up in a dorm like room full of strangers, I might be uncomfortable feeling like a foreigner or a tourist, I won't be comfortable showering near a bunch of strangers- being lost is the ultimate "uncomfortable"- BASICALLY NOTHING ABOUT MY JOURNEY WILL BE COMFORTABLE. 

but. isn't there that diagram with your comfort zone/where the magic happens? 

I guess I will test the limits of that diagram and let you know how it goes. 

Final thoughts-

I leave in 4 days.

I am going to miss my favorite buddies so much- we have been attached to each other for over a year; I cannot wait to talk to them along they way though- they make me laugh/cry/die all in one phone call. They are watching my puppy and keeping my room while I am gone so they deserve love/ good karma and an honorable mention- I love you idiots. 

lets do this.



*My Dad does not have a problem at all/ he has drinks but its not like a HE DRINKS and I cry kind of thing. I love him and he has been brutally honest about the dangers of traveling alone- but he supports me and celebrates my bravery- he is a good dad.